Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
