I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize