its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Mom said you looked used
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Randomize
