just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
