i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
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