Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
