She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
