Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
honey bunches of taint.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
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