Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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