i permit you to call me
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
