She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize