Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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