I need help removing her.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Randomize