There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
