She is in my trunk
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize