i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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