i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
