just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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