Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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