I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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