She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
