that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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