he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
