My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
