I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
