my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
