quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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