What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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