Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
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