I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
