She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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