I don't usually arrange sex via text message
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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