My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Randomize
