god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
