a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
