Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
