Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
