You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize
