I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Randomize
