Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
PANTIES FOUND
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