it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
