We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Randomize