I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize