Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
