I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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