Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
