Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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