Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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