I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize