And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
